Bride Threatens Not to Attend Friend’s Local Nuptials

It’s one of the biggest decisions of the wedding-planning process: Figuring out where you want to tie the knot. You may decide to say “I do” in your or your partner’s hometown or host your nuptials in your current city of residence. Maybe you’ll use your big day as an opportunity to visit a dream locale, opting for a destination wedding. Yet beyond serving as the backdrop to your ceremony, the location you select will also dictate your guest list. Due to travel expenses, booking a space on another continent may prohibit many of your loved ones from attending. However, one bride wasn’t ready to accept this trade-off, threatening to skip her close friend’s local wedding after the woman informed her that she didn’t know if she had the funds to make it to her celebration abroad. 

In a post on Reddit’s “Wedding Planning” subreddit, the cost-conscious friend detailed the conflict between her and the bride. “My close friend and I both got engaged in 2024 and started planning our weddings together,” she wrote. “My friend isn’t getting family support and rents in a Canadian very high-cost-of-living city with her fiancé. When we started planning, she became really stressed about the costs of having a wedding in our city.” After hearing about a European country that potentially had affordable wedding packages, the Redditor passed the information along to the bride, who ultimately ended up booking a venue in said country. The bride and groom scheduled their nuptials for six months before the original poster’s own big day in 2026. “She’s expecting me to attend, but I honestly don’t think I can,” the OP wrote. “Flights to that city are very expensive, and with my own wedding, my fiancé’s sister’s wedding (we’re both in the wedding party), a house purchase, and a honeymoon all happening in 2026, I just don’t think it’s feasible financially or logistically.” 

Since the bride and groom are operating on a smaller budget, they decided not to extend an invitation to the Redditor’s partner, making the situation more uncomfortable for her. “My fiancé isn’t invited unless more people decline,” she wrote. “I get it, but it feels awkward that I’d have to attend alone, especially with all the sacrifices it would take for me to make the trip.” When the Redditor informed her friend that she likely wouldn’t be able to attend the nuptials, the bride got upset. “She said that I was the one who encouraged her to consider this location, and I get that—I did—but I didn’t realize she’d book it so close to my own wedding, or that it would put me in this position,” she wrote. “Now, she’s told me that she might have to reconsider attending my wedding (which is local!?). I feel terrible, but I also don’t know how to make this work without causing major stress for myself.” 

While the internet agreed that the Redditor had indicated that she would be able to attend such a destination wedding by suggesting her friend book a venue in the European country, they ultimately encouraged her to do what was best for her and her finances—even if that meant skipping the celebration. “This is hard and I’m sorry you’re dealing with it,” one person wrote. “You are not in the wrong for prioritizing the financial health of your new marriage.” Others criticized the bride for not extending an invitation to the OP’s fiancé: “I think not inviting your fiancé is a bit of a red herring – from the way you’ve described your situation, you wouldn’t be able to afford it either way,” one commenter added.